The way the modern world works is that I can’t possibly send you all a Christmas card without falling foul of some data protection or anti-stalking legislation. And that would be a Very Bad Way Indeed to finish the year.

So the next best thing I can think of is to send you all a downloadable Voynich Christmas card from me as a PDF for you to print out and to put on your mantelpiece. Or to put next to all the other cards you get from people you don’t know very well but who keep sending you them every year, even though you never send them one back in return. Or to just briefly look at on the computer. Or to just ignore, it’s your call, really.


To get the full Christmassy effect you need to print it out and then fold it twice so that the above image is on the front sheet. This is about a hundred times easier than the way I’ve just described it, but never mind, you’ll see what I mean. 🙂

Note that the nymph on the left is from f80v of the Voynich Manuscript: she is plainly holding some kind of clever basting device for cooking her festive turkey, though I have to say that she also seems to have had a bit of an accident with the extra-wide foil for wrapping her bird in. (I think you’ll find that “Wolkenband” is the German word for “cooking foil”, if you check your dictionary extremely selectively). And why ever she’s trying to cook it without any clothes on I just don’t know. Perhaps it was too hot in the kitchen? “And then all my clothes fell off”? Riiiight.

But all the same, I think we can safely conclude from all this that the Voynich Manuscript is clearly not the memoirs of a stranded alien (as the Internet would currently have you believe, *sigh*) but is instead an early modern cooking manual.

Who would have thought it, eh? Merry Christmas! 😉

8 thoughts on “Happy Voynich Christmas from Cipher Mysteries!

  1. This blows the mystery wide-open . . . the herbs mistakenly thought to be a “pharma” section are obviously secret spice mixtures with their specialized grinders/curing containers for the nymph’s legendary stuffing recipes 😉

  2. boyfriend , Champollion,,. :-) on December 11, 2015 at 11:01 pm said:

    Merry Christmas Nick.

    ( that lady has a dick in his hand. From the bird. Symbol typists. qwill of a bird. This tells us that she wrote it.

    The first 3 words :
    Poccty. toe. Poccty.

    1. Poccty = Počty = Numbers , Arithmetic.
    2. toe = to je = it is.
    3. Poccty . substitution 3- C,G,L,S. = c=s. =Possty = Pošty = Post.

    old czech language – cc = č. ( ss = š )

  3. D.N. O'Donovan on December 12, 2015 at 3:51 pm said:

    So Nick –
    Happy Christmas.
    Puzzled by the inclusion of a post-1492 turkey…

    Also, as non sequitur, I have ordered a replacement for my copy of “Curse” which was another item lost. Put in the order about six weeks ago. Is there a delay in supply, do you know?

  4. Diane: well spotted there. Extra roast potatoes for the lady. 😉

    As to Curse: there’s no sign here of any order having arrived from you in 2015 at all, did you place it via Paypal or Amazon?

  5. bdid1dr on December 12, 2015 at 6:16 pm said:

    Perhaps all orders have ended up in Santa’s warehouse for his team of elves to pick up and load onto the sleigh for overnight delivery? Yo ho ho or hee hee?
    On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me — a partridge in a pear tree
    two turtle doves, three french hens, four calling birds, —- five Golden rings ……..

    Diane, did you post that Christmas card (you displayed on your site) to Nick and friends a couple of years ago? Collage?
    You know which one I mean. Hilarious!

  6. D.N. O'Donovan on December 13, 2015 at 4:11 am said:

    Through the Compelling Press “buy now international” – type in card details.


  7. D.N. O'Donovan on December 13, 2015 at 4:20 am said:


    Not sure which one you mean. This was one of my favourites.

  8. The particular card you posted showed “Santa’ in his workshop with a whole bunch of ‘familiar’ elves apparently working at top speed (deadline?)

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